我在大学时经历的两个丧亲经验，引领我踏入辅导这一领域。记得当时随着丧亲造访的除了哀伤，还有对身边亲人的死亡焦虑。这个焦虑是我接触辅导的起点，第一次以来访者的身份体验辅导。也因为这两个经验，让我在后来投身辅导领域时，对哀伤辅导格外热忱。
这两次的丧亲经验发生时我都身处国外，在我的哀伤历程中好像都缺少了集体的那一块。后来这成为了我潜心研究探索马来西亚华人丧礼与哀悼仪式在哀伤历程中所扮演的角色的契机。我很荣幸，有机会与六位丧亲者对话。透过与他们的对话，我了解到这些仪式是如何即这些仪式如何为哀伤创造空间、促进与逝去亲人的持续联结，并提供重要的社会支持。对我而言，撰写这篇论文的旅程超越了研究本身，更让我感到深刻的是在这过程中体验到我们共同的人性，并见证了超越时间和空间的爱。它提醒了我人类与生俱来去爱的能力，即便是死亡也无法阻挡我们寻找方法来维系爱与联结。
我想，或许投身在哀伤辅导的学习，以及这个研究，是我独特的，与我逝去的挚爱连结的方式。
如果你对这篇论文感兴趣，欢迎随时联系我，我很乐意和你分享电子版的论文！
The two profound losses I experienced during my university years were what ultimately led me into the field of counselling. I vividly remember that alongside the overwhelming grief, there was a deep-seated anxiety about the mortality of those around me. This anxiety became my entry point into counselling, my very first experience as a client seeking support. And it’s precisely because of these two formative experiences that, when I later committed to the counselling profession, I developed an extraordinary passion for grief and bereavement counselling.
Both of these significant losses occurred while I was studying abroad, and during my grieving process, I often felt a distinct absence of collective support. This later became the catalyst for me to delve deep into researching and exploring the role of Malaysian Chinese funeral and mourning rituals in the bereavement journey. I was truly honored to have the opportunity to engage in heartfelt conversations with six bereaved individuals. Through our dialogues, I came to understand how these rituals indeed create a sacred space for grief, foster a continuing bond with departed loved ones, and provide crucial social support. For me, the journey of writing this paper transcended mere research; what touched me most profoundly was experiencing our common humanity and witnessing a love that exists beyond time and space. It served as a powerful reminder of humanity’s innate capacity to love, and that even death cannot stop us from finding ways to maintain those precious connections.
I believe that perhaps immersing myself in the study of grief counselling, and undertaking this research, is my unique way of connecting with my departed loved ones.
Link to read the paper: https://www.tandfonline.com/eprint/AAQJJGVKXPRWWYCXSVB5/full?target=10.1080/13576275.2025.2534487
If you’re interested in reading the full paper, I would be happy to provide you with a softcopy. Please feel free to reach out!
